Rebekah Honeycutt

Light and Love be with you!

A Boy and A Girl

Imperfect Perfections / Love Photos / CC BY-NC-ND

Once Upon A Time…

there was a boy and a girl.

The girl was falling, falling fast.

As she looked around she saw the faces of the past. Faces of Grief, Agony, Depression. Faces of Anger, Despair, and Solemn.

Then she looked down.

She saw a boy standing below her with his arms held upward.

His face showed Love, Desire, Passion. His face showed Delight, Compassion, and Understanding.

She focused her thoughts on him, and him alone.

She released the views and memories of all the other faces shes had seen.

She fell directly into his arms. She felt warmth, Security, and Strength.

As she looked into his eyes, and his eyes met hers, every thought was released.

She knew she had found him- she had found her love.

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A Short Story: An Evening in Our Park

He was bowing on one knee, staring into my eyes. I couldn’t imagine a better feeling. My mind was filled with many thoughts; my eyes were filled with tears.

He smiled as he lifted me from my bed and cradled me in his arms. His bare chest was hot against my skin. He kissed me gently as he then lowered me into the chair.

A moan escaped my mouth as a chill swept through my body; the pain of movement is unbearable. I saw the sorrow in his eyes that he tried to hide so gracefully. He placed the pink blanket across my lap, and then moved the hair from my eyes.

He took my left hand as I drove with my right; I glided as he walked. We grinned at the birds fighting for water in the fountain. We found beauty within the scene. He kicked rocks off the path as he sang his song he made for me.

We arrived at our tree, a simple yet gorgeous weeping willow. He once again bowed to one knee and looked longingly into my eyes. This is the man I chose, the man who chose me.

He lifted my weak body and brought me close to him again. The safety of his arms and the security in his voice; these are the things I would miss the most. His smile was bright and his lips leaned closer to my ear.

“You are the one I have waited for,

You are the one I adore.

Without you my life will be poor,

Until I am with you once more.”

Tears began to flood our eyes as he sat on our bench. He held me like a child, one he had protected for many years. The pain was agonizing as it spread through my heaving chest. I couldn’t stop the sobs but I didn’t care, I was sharing this time with him.

I took in his scent, and blinked to clear my eyes. I wanted to see him tell a story. This bench was named the reminiscing seat; the place for discussing our memories.

“I recall the first time I saw you. You were sitting with Evelyn. She became distracted by a boy and in that moment you looked up. Your alluring eyes locked with mine. The blue in your eyes seemed to swirl and I was hooked. Do you remember what I said?”

He smiled as he looked into my eyes. I nodded my head, I wanted to answer him, but he understood I could not.

“Of course you do. You will never let me forget.” He laughed heartily like there was no weight on his shoulders. “I said… Umm. Umm. You are wow.” I nodded once more and felt the smile spread on my face.

“And Darling, you are still wow!” His lips pressed against my temple. I could see the yearning in his eyes when he opened them once more. He wanted me more today than ever before.

I placed my hands on his cheeks and let our eyes connect. The desire for one last kiss overwhelmed me. I fumbled with my oxygen mask, and finally slid it down.

“Honey, no, you can’t,” he started as my lips pressed passionately to his.

This kiss was simple but powerful, it took over all of my senses. My eyes felt tired, by body began to tremble, but I couldn’t let this moment pass. My breath became shallow, but I held my lips firmly against his. I would not let the cancer keep me from him.

We both knew it was my time. His tears slid onto my lips. I mouthed the words, I adore you, as my last breath came and went.

-Rebekah Honeycutt 06/10/12

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A moral/ethical/cultural issue

In our culture it is considered wrong to not do everything possible to keep another human alive. In saying that, I disagree. When a person has decided that they are ready to leave this life and move on (to the next, or heaven, or whatever comes after death) I believe full-heartedly that decision is theirs to make. My personal reality of this occurred with my wonderful, amazing Grandmother. She was a breast cancer survivor from the first episode, and the second episode attacked her lungs. She was in the hospital being given morphine for her pain, and oxygen to aid her in continuing life. The oxygen was not just by one source, but two. She was on a NC at 6 lpm, and also a NRB at 10 lpm. These two were simultaneously keeping her oxygen saturation at 91-93%. She couldn’t speak very much due to the work to breathe. She continued like this for weeks, it was difficult to watch. She never complained or acted in a non-kind manner. She was ready to go; she had been for 14 years when the love of her life passed away. When the day came and I was the only person in the room with her, she reached over and grabbed my hand with her left. She looked deep into my eyes while she reached up and took her oxygen off with her right. I asked her if she was ready to go, and she nodded. She then continued to stare ahead without fear, without emotion. I told her to tell my grandfather hello and dance with him and Jesus for me (she was very religious). I began singing her favorite songs as she passed into the next life. My mother came in during this time and tried to put the oxygen back on, I wouldn’t allow it, and she then realized what was occurring. In my career field we are shown the ways to keep another alive, by any means necessary. In this moment, none of those procedures/protocols were needed. We are not taught how to handle this situation, but in my eyes, I did exactly what needed to be done.

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